Blah Blah Babycakes

No Liquids

Once upon a time there was a very naughty little girl.  She was so naughty that sometimes she'd stay up late drinking wine while surfing the Internet for JCrew coupons.  One night, just days after getting her brand new laptop, she spilled a glass of cheap pinot noir all over it.  The naughty little girl was devastated and because of her crime went into a deep depression. 

Many days went by and then finally she got her computer back, fixed up good as new by a magic fairy.  (Magic fairies charge around $200 an hour these days.) The naughty little girl had never felt more relieved and she promised to never be naughty again.

The end.

The moral of the story:  Don't drink cheap wine.

 

Mug shot taken with built-in camera from the
almost destroyed laptop.

Color Me Beautiful

I went to my new apartment today to choose paint colors.  It was supposed to be fun and easy, but since I'm incapable of allowing anything in my life to be either of those things, it turned into a color choosing meltdown/disaster and the walls are still white.  Choosing a car later in the afternoon proved to be just as difficult. Red, blue or silver?  Silver?  No.  Blue?  No.  Red?  NO WAY.  CRAP!  Okay, fine blue.  Wait, maybe red isn't so bad.  No, no definitely silver.  (I went with blue)

Poor me with all the choices.  Imagine the scene when I had to choose a bouncy seat for Henry. (I made the wrong choice)

This is where i'm hanging out until my apartment is ready:

The food portions in these parts are ENORMOUS:

Henry is having a blast in the mutli-level, fun house of stairs:

And me?  Well, i'm okay when I remember to breathe.  I'll be even better when all of my earthly possessions finally arrive and I make friends and get a job and choose colors and get a life and stop being so pathetic...

Exposure Therapy

One of my worst fears was realized tonight on my way home from work.  Someone barfed on the subway. For 6 years I've avoided this scenario, mainly by refusing to ride on weekend nights and St. Patrick's Day and then today, blech! The only reason I didn't immediately dump my entire bottle of xanax down my throat was the fact that I didn't actually see the miscreant who did it.  In fact, I was sort of clueless to the entire episode (thank you ipod) until I noticed that one end of a v. crowded train was completely void of people.  When I didn't see a smelly bum I knew right away what must have happened. Sure enough someone had puked.  At the next station we were told to exit the train because of an "unsafe condition" and the Vomit Express was taken out of service.

Instead of shaking and weeping all the way to the nearest taxi I took a few deep breaths and got on the next train, shaking and weeping.

Brrrr!

I'm having a freak-out.  Winter is quickly approaching and the only thing in Henry's cold weather arsenal is one measly fleece pull-over. I need supplies and there are too many choices and all this decision making is bringing on a panic attack.  Last year was easy. 

I just bundled him up in a bunting and off we went.

Do I want a full on one-piece, down-filled, arctic tundra snowsuit?  Will a Hannah Anderson fleece coverall be sufficient?  Do I need both?  What about the adorable baby pea coat I found?  And how cute is this?

Most importantly... WHY DO ALL OF THESE ITEMS COST $75??